Lacking talent

I am desperate to find something I excel at. I look around me at the people I know and I can name at least 10 things my family and friends can do sooo much better than me. When I look at myself I can only say "yeah, I'm ok at that. Not great, but ok." I don't want to be ok at something anymore. I want to be great. I have tried several things and have not found one thing I'm great at. It makes me feel very worthless especially when I think about it too much (such as now). These feelings of uselessness and worthlessness have been eating me alive lately. The Lord says he gives everyone talents but I have yet to find mine.
I had a friend tell me that I am beautiful (such a sweet compliment).... that's not a talent and beauty always fades. Someone tried to cheer me up and say I am good at decorating... this made me laugh out loud! My house is still decorated for Easter! I have Easter eggs all over still. So no. That is not one of my talents. Writing, singing, dancing, drawing.... all things I would love to be great at but will never be. I've come to accept those things but I wish I could find just one thing that was mine that I could say "yes, I am great at that." I keep praying for the Lord to help me find my talents. Maybe I am not praying the right way or maybe I am praying for the wrong thing? I'm not sure. I just hope one day I can feel a little bit of accomplishment in my little life. Something that makes me feel good about myself. I think everyone needs that. Sigh.

Can't Wait!

I am a HUGE vampire lover. Huge. I'm not ashamed to admit it. So I can't wait until Vampire Diaries airs again this fall! Course it premiers on Sawyers birthday. Thank goodness for DVR!

Delicious New Recipe

I just tried a fantastic new recipe! Its got a different flavor than the 'normal' stuff I cook but it was great! Tasty, easy, and cheap! That's my kind of recipe! Here it is:

Honey Mustard Kielbasa & Potatoes

Ingredients:

3/4 cup dry white wine (I didn't have this so I just used liquid white wine)

1/4 cup Honey Mustard

2 Tbsp. brown sugar

1 lb. Kielbasa, cut into 1-inch pieces

1 1/4 lb. red potatoes ( about 4) cut into 3/4 inch pieces

1 large onion, sliced

Make It:

Heat oven to 400 degrees. Mix first 3 ingredients until well blended. Combine remaining ingredients in shallow pan. Drizzle with wine mixture; toss to coat. Bake 55 minutes or until potatoes are tender, stirring occasionally.

** Substitue chicken brother or beer for the wine.**

Beyond Beautiful

More From Seattle

On the 2nd day of our Washington vacation we headed to the city. We went to the Experience Music Project/ Science Fiction Museum and had a blast!We wanted to go up to the Space Needle but Justin informed us it costs $15 just to go up there. So we decided against that and just took a pic of us in front of it! It worked!Then we took the Monorail! Not horribly exciting but it did take us to the mall where there was a huge candy shop! Yum. Then we went to the Public Market Center. This place was a mad house! People everywhere! We went to Pikes Place (that's where they throw the fish around) and did some shopping in there. Brandon bought me some peaches that were the best peaches I have had in ages! I mean juice dripping down your arm delicious! Makes me salivate just thinking about them!

We headed down to the docks to do a little more shopping and we found this shop called "Ye Ol' Curious". We headed in there and we found some pretty creep things...

These are real mummies! They were so well preserved in the desert sand that the mummy on the left still has his mustache, teeth, even eye brows! The lady (on the right) is older I believe and still well preserved! Ew!

Below are pics of real shrunken heads!! I found these interesting in a very disturbing way. Turns out in Equador the Wild Head Hunters of the Amazon River would cut off the heads of their enemies, bones were removed, pebbles and sand were heated in sulpor, alum, & lime. Then for 7 weeks these ingredients are shaken in the head everyday. The old chief uses his fingers to press the skin to retain the natural features. Isn't that just NUTS?! But interesting like I said in a disturbing way.

After the interesting store we headed back to Pykes Place. On the way Justin took us along a little ally where there was a "wall of gum" from the past 30+ years! I added mine cause I am nasty like that!

We headed back to our car after the market and decided since it was National Smore Day we HAD to go back to Theo's Chocolate factory and have a homemade smore. It was a must. Everything about these smores were homemade. The graham crackers, marshmallows, and of course the delightful chocolate. They were $3 a piece but they were sooo worth it!

Justin and I loving our smores! (I even had marshmallow all over my chin!)

Our last stop of the day was to Golden Gardens Beach. This by far was the best part of my day! I love the beach. I mean LOVE it. When I am at the beach I feel like I am home. May sound weird but its true. Its peaceful. A little slice of heaven!

Busy fun exciting day! More to come!

Day 1 In Seattle

Brandon and I decided to take this random trip to Seattle for 2 reasons.

Reason #1- I have 3 step-brothers that live there that I really don't know very well and wanted to get to know them better. They live in Washington so we decided to head there and have them show us around while we bonded.

Reason #2- We plan on expanding our family within the next few months so this would be our last real opportunity for a vacation. So we invited ourselves up and lucky for us my brother's were able to take off some time at their works and show us the sights!

It was awesome! We did SOOOO much stuff its insane. The first day we arrived around 8:30 am so first thing we did was go out for breakfast. I had delicious waffles with strawberries and whip cream! Delightful. Next we headed to some random joke store which was where I saw this cool graffiti Gotta admit its pretty sweet! We then headed to Gas Works Park. Didn't spend too much time there but it was pretty neat to see.

Then we headed to the Microsoft store where my other step-brother Chris works. We played with a few of the 'toys' there such as the Tablet. The Tablet is awesome! Its huge but you can do some pretty neat things! We were in need of some food so we got cupcakes that were so prettyThey were a delicious snack! We went to a vintage store and I found some pretty stylin' sunglasses....Hot?! I thought so! lol
After the shopping we ended up going to some little pizza place where there is lingerie all over the walls and outside! It was great! They had some pretty interesting signs...

Thankfully the pizza was great!! The place was a little.... questionable! Fun though.

We caught Justin using the woman's 'powder room'!! We were walking around town when I stumbled across two kinda odd things...

First this poster!

And then this street sign! Gotta love it!

After the delicious pizza, we went to Theo's Chocolate Factory! They have a bunch of different chocolate bars that they cut up for you to sample. They had crazy kinds like a chili pepper one that burned the carp out of my mouth, orange, basil, lavendar, and a bunch others. I ended up getting 4 different kinds of chocolates and caramels. I loved LOVED the Lavendar salted caramel. It was amazing! They take pure lavendar and mix it right in with the chocolate. Wow! Delicious! Later that night we went to Molly Moon's Ice cream shop. I didn't get anything but I was able to sample some Cucumber shorbet and another kind but I can't remember but they were both nasty in my opinion. But Brandon loved his HUGE Ice cream cone!

We ended up going to bed probably around 1 or 1:30 am (which was 2am our time). Whew! Busy first day but it was great!

Leaving For Vaca

We are getting ready to head out the door for our 5 day vacation. Am I panicking... Oh yeah. The longest I have been gone from Sawyer was 2 days but he was with his daddy so I wasn't worried. Not that his grandma's don't know what they are doing I am just super protective and paranoid! We had a trust done. That's how paranoid I am! Its good to be prepared right? I am sure nothing is going to happen and Sawyer will have a great time with his grandmas and we will have a great time in Seattle. But I want to say this: Goodbye Blogging friends/family. See you in 5 days!

Poo poo in The Pottay!

That's right all Sawyer went poo poo in the potty for the first time ever today! I'm so proud of him! I did take a picture of it(yes I am sick what do ya do) but I decided that is only a picture a mommy would love!! I'll spare everyone that little picture this time!

Zoo Picture

Varian Zoo Trip

Video of Sheena and the Giraffes:



Video of Sawyer watching the birdshow:



Video of Dan running with the tigers:



We had a great time at the zoo! It was Brandon's work party and it was the best time I have had at the zoo this year! Hardly any people and it had rained earlier in the day so it was nice and cool. Awesome day!

Swimming

Last night Brandon and I took Sawyer swimming. It was great! Sawyer was using his arms and his legs to swim. I think the earlier swim lessons came back to him quickly! After a while he wanted to just swim by himself so he woud squirm to get out of our arms. Scary! We would also set him up on the side and let him jump in to us and he thought he could do it himself so he would try to run and jump in. Again scary! He did awesome though. He got to go down a big slide with daddy and got to play in the little kid area. He's getting go big!

Last Week's Girls Night

I forgot to post about my girls night last week with the "wardies"! We had a great time. Went out to dinner at Iggy's and gabbed a bunch there, did a tiny bit of shopping at Target, then went to see Letters To Juliet. Loved the movie! Loved being with my girls! Its been way too long again. Why do we not do it more often? No clue but I am going to change that!

I absolutely LOVE these girls! We have been friends for as long as I can honestly remember. We had fall outs but always find each other! True friends. Love you guys!

Cabin Weekend

We headed to the cabin this weekend so I could relax and Brandon could help put in cabinets! They look great! Such an improvement and what space!! We didn't do much riding but went Saturday for a short ride. We ended up getting rained on so we ran to the nearest Yurt to wait out the rain. We had a lot of fun! There were cards already in there so we played spoons (classic game) and Texas Hold em' and we used matches for chips!! I was the big winner! I should go to Vegas! lol We had a great time even tho were weren't able to ride!

When we came home last night we knew the relaxing was over. We ended up having a dang mouse run in our room! We cleaned out everything in our room and vacuumed everything. We ended up catching 2 mice within 2 hours of putting out traps. Today, we are going to have to go through our pantry and clean it out now. Kinda nervous what I am going to find in there to be honest. Like I said eariler I am going to organize every room. That is my goal. No more of these dang mouse hunts.

Organizing

With this stupid mouse invasion its making me want to clean, sanitize and organize the crap out of my house. I want to go to Walmart and buy a bunch of organizational tools but I think if I go alone I will go HOG wild and buy wayyy too much. I can't get my mind off it tho. Its like an itch I can't scratch.... kinda driving me crazy. I become obsessed with things. Can ya tell?